Boring transition: The Pandemic Team

We are in the worst medical nightmare in a century, and our new president-elect has chosen to be flagrantly responsible. I mean, you would think that this president doesn’t understand that “content is king”at all.

Based on his choices for the COVID-19 Advisory Board, you’d think Joe Biden knows nothing about the news. Nothing. He clearly doesn’t understand that we are trapped in our homes drinking, and the only thing we are living for is the anxiety of the next sweepingly dismissive insult to someone who doesn’t even deserve it. If they don’t deserve it, doesn’t Joe know that we’re all supposed to find a way to *make* them deserve it?

Surely, Dr. Vivak Murthy isn’t just an overwhelmingly qualified professional who comports himself with a strange and unfamiliar air of dignity and mutual respect for……people.

Yes, people.

I was attempting, in my momentary haze, to conjure up the specific type of person Dr. Murthy respects and works to preserve, but according to his book it’s just all people. God, it lacks specificity, it’s positively outrageous. If he’s an academic, isn’t he supposed to be an insect?

I thought he was highly educated with his Harvard and Yale degrees, his apparent interdisciplinary approach to his personal calling (whatever that is), and all of that care for the HIV/AIDS patients we forgot when the good movies were getting kind of stale. Oh, and the women in rural India “ thing.” If he’s so educated, does he not also know that we are a nation shot through with steroids and there are liberals out here putting their flags back up.

If I could afford pearls, my god I would clutch them.

Surely he’s been an asshole to someone, somewhere, at some point in his 38 years that we can find to hang on him. Surely at least a chunk of his life was on the Internet being completely irresponsible with his reputation like the rest of us. I mean, what else did Zuckerberg build the evil empire for but to trap us? I know, Zuck, you didn’t see this coming when you made the “poke” function, but….would you switch out the billions for an ordinary life where you don’t have to testify to septuagenarians? No. Shush. I digress.

My fellow Americans, what are the next four years going to be like? Are we all going to just happily take a nap and do the actual self-care we share memes about and not create drama around a person we would not have stalked prior to…..whatever those 4 years were? It wasn’t Armageddon like some of y’all said because I pinched myself and a good percentage are still alive.

And I think that’s what Biden is going for. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.